Archive for the ‘Dearest’ Tag

It’s B-a-a-c-k!   Leave a comment


The malware is completely gone from Power Surge, the Google Malware message is gone (if you still see it, clear our your browser cache), the boards are updated and have a fresh new skin.

I think Alice would be proud!

Welcome back, Surgettes!

Posted October 8, 2013 by MaryO in Message Boards

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From MsReadyToExhale   Leave a comment

I too am sorry to learn that we lost Dearest, a true visionary. I too would like to see her work preserved and maintained. I also want to pledge to donate. All I ask is that the means for donating be secure.

This site has helped me through some tough and scary times. The women here are Angels.

Please keep us posted and let us know how we can help.

Thank you for all that you are currently doing to maintain the site.

Peace and love to you Mary and my PS sisters.

Posted October 7, 2013 by MaryO in In Memory

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Comments from the Memorial Book   1 comment

I will add to this as more comments are shared.

A Power-Surge Sister
Sep 5, 2013 11:51 AM
Alice, I want to thank you for everything you did for so many of us. You saved our lives. We love you.

A Power-Surge Sister
Sep 5, 2013 03:09 PM
Alice…Just wanted to Thank You for all you have done for me and for thousands of other women in the world….you and your PowerSurge website saved so many lives….and helped so many women when we were in the deepest, darkest place in our lives…you leave behind a GREAT legacy….and because of you & powersurge…so many woman have come thru to the other side of that long tunnel with a re-newed wisdom in their souls…and thru the site we have made many lifelong friends along the way…GodSpeed My Sister and Chief Bottle Washer

Oct 5, 2013 07:29 AM
My sincerest condolences to your family. I will be forever grateful for the Power Surge website and you. It helped me cope with an extremely difficult. God bless you Alice.

Oct 5, 2013 08:23 AM
I am very saddened to hear of Alice’s passing. Like many women, I don’t know what I would have done without her. Alice not only provided thousands of women help and support through her website, she personally supported me through chats and phone calls. Alice, so many will miss you

PS member
Oct 5, 2013 08:52 AM
I am very sadden to learn of Alice passing. She was such an inspiration for thousands of women and will be missed. Thank you Alice for all the help and support, I would not make it through the passage without Power Surge! My sincerest condolences to your family. RIP Dearest.

Diane Emerson
Oct 5, 2013 09:03 AM
Thank you for your extraordinary effort to help others. What an enormous impact you have had on countless women. Your kindness and compassion is contagious. It is a legacy that will continue to bless. I am eternally grateful for the blessing of Alice Stamm. God bless your family.

Oct 5, 2013 09:28 AM
I am so sad to hear of Alice’s passing. She was a true warrior in the fight for women’s physical and mental health during the middle years. Alice was held in the highest esteem, and she will be missed greatly. Sincerely, Another Power Surge Sister

A P-S Sister in Virginia
Oct 5, 2013 10:15 AM
So very sad to hear of Alice’s passing. She has had a huge helping impact on women all over this world and it will never be forgotten. My prayers to her family.

Lisa Ashton
Oct 5, 2013 10:20 AM
A PS sister from RI.

So sad to hear of Alice’s passing..she gave so much love, support and understanding to what we are all going through…a true angel..

My prayers are with you

Oct 5, 2013 10:46 AM
Alice, I too like to thank you for all that you have done for all women around the world who went through difficult time. You brought us all together, we shared laughs …cried & learned that PS was a place of comfort & a place for each of us to lean on each other. I have met in person a few beautiful ladies, know that you changed the world & got us all talking. What a Legacy, and I hope you are free of pain & heaven got another angel ❤ Bless you ❤

Oct 5, 2013 05:54 PM
God Bless all of you. Alice was a very special lady. she helped a lot of us and we will be forever grateful and miss her terribly. R.I.P Alice.

Oct 5, 2013 06:04 PM
Alice helped me in too many ways to mention.I will always remember the compassion she put into helping women everywhere. I do not know what I would have done with out Power Surge. I am so sad to hear of her passing.

Oct 6, 2013 10:24 AM
So many are sadden and heartbroken to learn of Alice passing. She was there in our darkest moments to shine a light. The world has indeed lost a one of a kind rare gem! You may be gone Dearest Alice but NEVER will you be forgotten!

Oct 7, 2013 06:33 AM
My deepest condolences to Alice’s family. Thank you Dearest Alice for pioneering widespread support for thousands of women everywhere, your generosity and compassion was a gift for us all. You will be missed.

Leticia Jasso tinks
Oct 7, 2013 08:18 AM
Alice your being missed as we speak my condolences to those who now are in pain for your loss may they be comforted in knowing how very much you were loved by all us gals across the globe

Oct 7, 2013 06:07 PM
Alice, thank you for bringing women together during their times of need. Never to be forgotten for your good deeds!
RIP My sincere condolences to your family.

Mary Beth ( Emm Bee)
Oct 7, 2013 07:35 PM
Alice, You taught us how to be strng in the face of the craziness of life changes we couldn’t begin to imagine. You brought us together, you leave a legacy of thousands of sisters….You will never ever be forgotten – the calls, the thursday night open chats, the tears, the laughter the arguments, the healing, the help and mostly, The Love. You are STILL here. I hope somewhere you are somehow knowing how much you are loved. My deepest condolences and sympathy to everyone who loves you. I know I do. I will miss you….. ❤ You taught me so much. ((((( DEAREST)))))

AnxietyAttack ..AA…Sherlock
Oct 8, 2013 04:12 PM
I was so sorry to hear of Alice’s passing…Alice & PowerSurge were a God send to me in my time of need..when I first stumbled upon PowerSurge I found a community of wonderful women…who were all going thru exactly what I was….I no longer felt alone….i no longer felt I was losing my mind…..we all pulled each other thru our darkest hours…and in doing that we all became great friends…Alice and i became friends…I remember those long 4 hrs phone calls …alot of them in the middle of the night LOL…Alice left a legacy that I hope will live on for a long long time…helping the next generation of women going thru this very hard time of life….my sympathies and prayers go out to Alice’s family and friends…her life had a very important purpose…she helped so many people from all over the world…she may have never met them…but she & her vision saved many lives…and we will all be 4 ever grateful to her….GodSpeed My Sister

AnxietyAttack ..AA…Sherlock
Oct 8, 2013 04:12 PM
I was so sorry to hear of Alice’s passing…Alice & PowerSurge were a God send to me in my time of need..when I first stumbled upon PowerSurge I found a community of wonderful women…who were all going thru exactly what I was….I no longer felt alone….i no longer felt I was losing my mind…..we all pulled each other thru our darkest hours…and in doing that we all became great friends…Alice and i became friends…I remember those long 4 hrs phone calls …alot of them in the middle of the night LOL…Alice left a legacy that I hope will live on for a long long time…helping the next generation of women going thru this very hard time of life….my sympathies and prayers go out to Alice’s family and friends…her life had a very important purpose…she helped so many people from all over the world…she may have never met them…but she & her vision saved many lives…and we will all be 4 ever grateful to her….GodSpeed My Sister

Oct 8, 2013 04:13 PM
Alice… see…somethings never change…i still cant work this puter…

PS Sister90
Oct 8, 2013 06:14 PM
My condolences to Alice’s family; if it wasn’t for Alice creating this website I don’t know what I would have done. It gave (and still gives) me great comfort as I go through my difficult menopause journey. Prayers and hugs to your entire family

Carrie Carr
Oct 10, 2013 11:38 PM
I did not know Alice personally, but the PS website literally saved my sanity during one of the worst health-related times of my life. Through it, I was able to meet many women going through or had gone through much of what I had been going through. Those same women are now like sisters to me. They are there for me every second of my life and because of Alice and her dedication to PS, many of our lives will never be the same. For the better. RIP Alice. My deepest condolences to your family and dear friends who love you so much.

Peggy Boyd
Oct 11, 2013 11:13 PM
Just heard the sad news. I am sorry for the family’s loss but we all lost a dear friend at her passing. She will be missed by women the world over. She was a real hero!

Oct 12, 2013 12:25 AM
From New Zealand

I just wanted your family to know Alice how much your work was able to help women like myself around the world.

A Power-Surge Sister
Oct 19, 2013 12:54 PM

So very sorry to hear of the passing of Alice. Thank you so much for what you did for us all with your wonderful website Power Surge. You will never be forgotten. God bless you and RIP.



Posted October 7, 2013 by MaryO in In Memory

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From Tinks   2 comments

I am heart broken I would love for Alice to know that you dont have to go out and climb high mountains, or write important books, or even compose the most beautiful song ever and think this was all so important to do.

What Alice did was save my sanity, she helped me get a gripe on a very bad time in my life and in doing so she touched my family and they got relief by seeing me get better and understand these emotions that come with being a woman and menopause.

She was just one person that followed her heart and had such a passion and love for what she did and she loved so deeply she loved us all as a mother does her children.

I say Dearest was an amazing women that maybe alot of people will never know who Alice was our Dearest Alice was but boy I sure wish I could SHOUT FROM THE ROOF TOPS FROM THE MOUNTAIN TOPS “Dearest thank you for all you are and all you did there are no words to properly thank you”

So as our hearts ache yes its painful but then that beautiful story about that Butterfly says that God so loved her He allowed this little creature to come and give comfort because she is in Heaven and is in His arms in peace and joy and calm from all this earthly hub bub we now have to endure and finish the good fight .

Dearest I didn’t know you personally but you were one of my Dearest friends.

One very brokenhearted little bug named Tinks

Posted October 7, 2013 by MaryO in In Memory

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From Gracie62   Leave a comment

“This site has literally saved my sanity and restored by sense of well-being while in the throes of perimenopause. I can’t imagine life without it as I log in everyday for a dose of comfort from these amazing women.

Dearest was an incredible woman and a pioneer in extending global help and support to millions of women.

Without her, many of us would be alone, afraid and left to face menopause without a clue as to how to get through it. May she rest in peace.”

Posted October 5, 2013 by MaryO in In Memory

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From Wildflowers/Donna   1 comment

Wildflowers on the PS Boards wrote:

PS-logoLong ago my daughter asked me who is Alice in regards to power-surge, I explained Alice in terms of rock and roll stars (something she could relate to at that time..)


I said..well…Alice is like Mick Jagger of The Rolling Stones, everyone loves Mick.

I told that story to Alice on the telephone and we laughed and laughed, since then,  when talking to Alice on the phone or chat etc..I’d call her Mick. We both got a kick out of her nickname..Mick.

Daughter then said “You mean, you get to talk to her on the phone, and she chats with you”???,

I said “yep” and she said OMIGOD (she was a teen then..) that is really like talking to the STAR and I said..”sure is”

I told daughter of “Micks” passing and she said “Oh Mom, I now realize (she’s almost 27 now) how much her website and friendship meant to you and how much it helped..”……..



Posted October 5, 2013 by MaryO in In Memory

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In Memory   1 comment

Please leave your happy memories and condolences in the comments section.


Posted October 5, 2013 by MaryO in In Memory

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Missing You   19 comments

Part of this I wrote already on the About Page:

This site is a labor of love.

My best friend and “sister”, Alice aka Dearest, was the founder of Power Surge – first on America Online, then as a free-standing site for over 20 years. We were best friends for about 18 of those years, talking about every other day for 2-3 hours at a time.

The day of Alice’s funeral, we had a beautiful butterfly just waiting outside the door when I took our dog out.

I have never seen a butterfly like this – no one here in Virginia has seen anything like this either and I never saw it again. It just sat there on the flower pot and “posed” for this picture. I like to think it was Alice saying goodbye to me.


It’s several weeks later and I’ve been given Power Surge.  I don’t know if I’ll be able to keep it going or not.  Certainly, it will never be as special a place as it was with Alice at the helm.

I look around the house and see things that remind me of Alice.  Gifts, print outs, silly stuff, memories, the entire AOL message boards on floppy disks…

Alice, I love you and will miss you always…


Posted October 5, 2013 by MaryO in In Memory

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The 34 Symptoms of Menopause – what they are and how to treat them   50 comments

MaryO’Note: Links are removed from this list

There’s been a list of the “34 signs of menopause” circulating for years. The list originated with Judy Bayliss’ wonderful newsgroup, The Menopaus Listserv (That’s Menopaus without the “e” at the end).

I’ve taken the liberty of adding my own Notes to the original list. You’ll find hundreds of articles pertaining to menopause symptoms, treatments and menopause / midlife-related health and emotional issues including articles on midlife relationships, weight and fitness issues, intimacy, psychological problems associated with menopause in Power Surge’s, “Educate Your Body” extensive library.

I suggest you begin with the comprehensive article explaining what menopause is: in “An Introduction To Menopause: Signs, Symptoms and Treatments”

You’ll find remedies for most of these symptoms on the Recommendations page.

Here is the list of: “The 34 Signs of Menopause:”

1. Hot flashes, flushes, night sweats and/or cold flashes, clammy feeling (related to increased activity in the autonomic / sympathetic nervous system). Without becoming too, technical, messages are sent to the hypothalmus because of declining estrogen production via neurons which result in vasodilation — widening of the lumen of blood vessels (lumen being the cavity of a tubular organ, i.e., the lumen of a blood vessel,) which, in turn, causes flushing or hot flashes. Tips for treating/minimizing (and even avoiding) hot flashes: Power Surge’s Menopause Survival Tips. Also, read the Power Surges (hot flashes) Forum

2. Bouts of rapid heartbeat (related to increased activity in the autonomic / sympathetic nervous system)

Note: Along with rapid heartbeat (palpitations), women can experience skipped heartbeats, irregular heartbeats. These are generally normal vasomotor responses experienced during menopause – usually due to fluctuating hormone levels. However, if these problems continue, it’s always a good idea to be checked by your health care practitioner. An echocardiogram is a common procedure to tell the doctor what he needs to know about your heart. If your health care practitioner doesn’t suggest it, ASK FOR IT! Read the Palpitations, Heart Issues, Hypertension Forum

3. Irritability. Note: Along with irritability, a host of “anger” problems can develop during menopause. Just as a perimenopausal woman can find herself suddenly crying for no apparent reason or provocation, so can she find herself reacting to given situations in an angrier manner than she normally does. This anger can sometimes feel like “rage.”

Again, this is hormone-induced, but for some women, the anger can become inappropriate and a woman can feel like she’s out of control. There’s nothing wrong with seeking counselling to discuss these issues with a mental health professional. This is a challenging time of life and some objective outside help can be tremendously useful in helping a woman cope with all the emotions she’s feeling. Remember, menopause isn’t simply physical changes, but emotional and spiritual changes as well. There’s an excellent forum on the Power Surge Message Board that deals with the issues of Anger / Mood Swings / Rage.

4. Mood swings, sudden tears. Note: Mood swings can include anything from mood shifts (happy one moment, depressed the next) to sudden bouts of crying when nothing overt has occurred to cause the crying. Mood swings can and have been misdiagnosed as bipolar disorder because one can feel such extremes of emotions due to hormone imbalance. Anxiety, depression, panic attacks and even feelings of agoraphobia aren’t uncommon during menopause. The panic attacks often can develop with the onset of hot flashes. For some women, hot flashes can be severe and quite frightening.

5. Trouble sleeping through the night (with or without night sweats). Note: This can develop into insomnia or just waking at 2 in the morning for an hour. Relaxation and breathing exercises can be useful at this time — many women may log onto the Power Surge message boards and are surprised to find so many other women there in the middle of the night. More help on the Insomnia, Sleep Disorders Forum

6. Irregular periods: shorter, lighter or heavier periods, flooding, and phantom periods. Note: A phantom period is when you experience all the symptoms you’re accustomed to having before you menstruate — but… no period comes. This is a common experience during perimenopause before a woman’s period actually stops.

7. Loss of libido (sex drive). Note: Not every woman loses her libido entirely during perimenopause, although some may temporarily. Many women simply have a decreased interest in sex – often it’s simply because they generally don’t feel well and sex is the last thing on their mind! Also, bear in mind that there are many medications that can affect one’s libido, including the anti-depressants some women take to cope with the depression and anxiety associated with menopause to anti-hypertensives.

8. Dry vagina (results in painful intercourse) Note: Click here for an excellent article about vaginal dryness, sexuality and midlife relationships. Recommended: Sexual Issues/Libido Forum

9. Crashing fatigue. Note: I’ve never been able to determine if the “fatigue” associated with perimenopause is a symptom in and of itself, or if it’s a side effect of the cumulative symptoms and general exhaustion (from them) many women experience. Take all the symptoms and “dump” them on one person — is it any wonder perimenopausal women are so fatigued? If you can, try to find time to grab a nap.

One of the things that helped my fatigue, and it’s all chronicled in my personal odyssey to find remedies, is the use of considerable amounts of soy isoflavones and protein, which I found in R Soy. I can’t say that it specifically targetted and relieved the crashing fatigue, but it helped so many other symptoms and gave me a burst of energy, that I feel comfortable in attributing the fatigue relief to R. There are various vitamins, such as those in the “B” family, that can help with fatigue as well. Also, increased amounts of vitamin C. The Recommendations page lists numerous vita-nutrients that can be useful in treating fatigue and other symptoms associated with perimenopause.

10. Anxiety, feeling ill at ease. Note: One of the biggest complaints during menopause. Read the Anxiety/Stress Forum

11. Feelings of dread, apprehension, and doom (includes thoughts of death, picturing one’s own death). Note: It’s possible that this can be a manifestation of depression associated with menopause, or possibly feelings that come from going through daily discomfort through a difficult menopause transition that can last anywhere from 3-12 years.

A woman living under these circumstances can feel totally overwhelmed and frightened by the physical, psychological and spiritual changes. When there seems to be no reprieve from the suffering, for some it can leave them feeling drained wondering when and IF they’ll ever feel well again. It isn’t unusual for women at this time of life to have thoughts about dying. One phase of their life is coming to a close (not soon enough for many). There may be apprehension and fear about moving on to the next phase of life and wondering whether things will get better or worse. Helpful: The Panic Attacks / Disorder / Fear / Apprehension Forum

12. Difficulty concentrating, disorientation, & mental confusion. Note: Forgetfulness during perimenopause is often referred to lightly and humorously as “brain fog” but it’s not always funny. Note: An excellent article, Menopause And The Mind. Also, visit the Memory Loss, Foggy Thinking, Forgetfulness, Verbal Slips Forum

13. Disturbing memory lapses. Note: See #12

14. Incontinence — especially upon sneezing, laughing: urge incontinence (reflects a general loss of smooth muscle tone).

15. Itchy, crawly skin (feeling of ants crawling under the skin, not just dry, itchy skin Note: the feeling of ants crawling on your skin is called “formication”) Visit the Your Skin: Dryness, Itching, Vaginal Dryness, Disorders, Discomfort Forum

16. Aching, sore joints, muscles and tendons. (may include such problems as carpal tunnel syndrome). Note: Osteoarthritis can develop during perimenopause – and those with existing arthritic and/or rheumatic pain may find it’s exacerbated during the menopausal transition. See the Joints Aches and Pains/Arthritis Forum

17. Increased tension in muscles.

18. Breast tenderness. Note: Breast swelling, soreness, pain.

19. Headache change: increase or decrease. Note Many women develop migraine headaches during perimenopause. However, if one doesn’t have a history of migraine headeaches, they’re generally a short-lived experience of perimenopause. Also see the Headaches, Migraine Forum

20. Gastrointestinal distress, indigestion, flatulence, gas pain, nausea. Note: For nausea, try some ginger or, as I use, boiling hot water with a few teaspoons of lemon or lemon juice concentrate in it. Many women also develop acid reflux (Gerd). For some, it can be an uncomfortable feeling of severe burning sensations in the throat. If it persists, see your health care practitioner.

21. Sudden bouts of bloat. Note: Bloating, water retention are common complaints during perimenopause. Also, Acid reflux and heartburn are very common during perimenopause. Treat them as you would if you weren’t going through menopause.

22. Depression (has a quality from other depression, the inability to cope is overwhelming, there is a feeling of a loss of self. Natural hormone therapy, ameliorates the depression dramatically). Note: There are various natural methods of treating depression. Read Power Surge’s Menopause Survival Tips.

Also, many women using progestins or progesterone supplementation experience “depression” as a side effect. Power Surge recommends only naturally compounded, bio-identical hormones. Naturally compounded estrogen and progesterone supplementation doses can be individually adjusted to suit each woman’s needs. So, if a woman is experiencing depression from progesterone, the level of progesterone supplementation can be reduced until the compounding pharmacist comes up with the right blend. The combination of estrogen and progesterone is important in achieving the desired results. Other remedies, such as St. John’s Wort can be very effective in alleviating the depression associated with menopause.

My personal experience was that my perimenopause-related depression was eliminated when I started using R Soy Protein. R is excellent for mood swings, but I was astonished by the impact it had on the hormone-related “lows” I experienced before using it. Also recommended, The Depression Forum

23. Exacerbation of any existing conditions. Note: Often, conditions women had prior to entering perimenopause become
exaggerated (worse) during the menopause transition.

24. Increase in allergies. Note: Many women who suffer from allergies develop worse allergies during the menopausal years. Many women who’ve never had allergy or respiratory problems may develop them for the first time. Many people don’t realize that histamine levels are affected by hormone levels. Women can develop wheezing, coughing and a host of respiratory problems. This generally disappears as the hormones level out once a woman becomes menopausal.

25. Weight gain. (is often around the waist and thighs, resulting in “the disappearing waistline” and changes in body shape.) A good read, Weight Gain and Fitness Issues

26. Hair loss or thinning, head or whole body, increase in facial hair. Note: There is often a loss of pubic hair during menopause. Many women are more comfortable simply shaving their pubic area instead of having patches of hair.

27. Dizziness, light-headedness, episodes of loss of balance. Note: Although common complaints during menopause, I always recommend anyone suffering from dizziness, dysequilibrium have her blood pressure checked just to be on the safe side. However, women can experience these symptoms during perimenopause without having hypertension.

28. Changes in body odor. Note: I wouldn’t be too concerned about this one. It can happen, but in 13 years of running Power Surge, I’ve heard of relatively few cases of developing body odor during menopause.

29. Electric shock sensation under the skin & in the head (“take the feeling of a rubber band snapping against the skin, multiply it (exponentially, sometimes) radiate it & put it in the layer of tissues between skin & muscle & sometimes a precursor to a hot flash.”) Note: Those buzzing sensations, as though you’ve put your finger into a live electrical socket, can be frightening. They’re all part of the hormones, nerve endings and electrical waves running through our bodies when our hormones are constantly fluctuating. Many women experience this during perimenopause, but it eventually passes.

30. Tingling in the extremities (can also be a symptom of B-12 deficiency, diabetes, or from an alteration in the flexibility of blood vessels n the extremities.)

31. Gum problems, increased bleeding.

32. Burning tongue

33. Osteoporosis (after several years)

34. Brittle fingernails, which peel & break easily.

Some additional signs from Dearest:

  • Internal shaking / tremor-like feelings. Read the Internal Shaking Forum
  • Acne and other skin eruptions
  • Itching wildly and erratic rashes
  • Shoulder pain / joints / arthritis development or flare up in
    preexisting conditions
  • “Heart pain” – a feeling of pain in the area of the
    heart (if persistent, get checked by your health care practitioner)
  • Acid reflux / heartburn / difficulty digesting certain foods

Some of the 34 signs may also be symptoms of one of the following:

  • Hypothyroidism
  • Diabetes
  • Depression with another etiology
  • Other medical conditions (see The Educate Your Body Library)

If you have reason to believe you may have one of these conditions, see your healthcare practitioner for treatment.


Note: Remember that although these may be common complaints during menopause, they might also indicate some other health problem. Be sure to consult with your personal health care practitioner before attributing these symptoms to menopause.