Archive for the ‘Alice’ Tag
In Judaism, there are several occasions each year when the dead are memorialized. The most significant of these is yahrzeit, the anniversary of the death, which is observed according to the Hebrew calendar. Most synagogues keep registries of the Hebrew dates of members’ deaths and send out notices reminding family members of the yahrzeit date.
As is the case in all Jewish holidays, yahrzeit observance begins at night. A 24-hour candle is lit and, as one woman I know says: “The spirit of the dead person fills the room again for 24 hours.” One attends synagogue for the evening, morning, and afternoon services and again recites the Kaddish [the memorial prayer].
One should not go to a celebration or party on the day of yahrzeit, and some people fast on that day.
Adapted from http://www.myjewishlearning.com/life/Life_Events/Death_and_Mourning/Burial_and_Mourning/Yahrzeit.shtml
English: A lit Yahrtzeit candle, a candle that is lit on the Hebrew anniversary of a loved one’s death. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)
The yahrzeit candle is lit during the week of Shiva (mourning). It is also lit at sundown on the eve of the yahrzeit (anniversary of the death) and at sundown preceding the start of Yom Kippur and at sundown preceding the last day of Succot, Passover and Shavuot.
These holidays all have yizkor (memorial) in synagogue as well.
Rest in peace, Dearest Alice.
It was a year ago today that I learned that Dearest (Alice) had died.
It was especially bittersweet because we came home from vacation through JFK airport a couple days ago. JFK was the last place I ever saw Alice alive.
This year has been a challenge with me missing my best friend, and the challenges of the site she left behind.
Everywhere in my home, there are gifts and letters/cards she sent, emails I printed out, reminders all over. I’ll see something on TV and think that Alice and I will have a laugh over that – then I remember all over again.
I miss you so much, Alice! 😦
Another birthday is here and I’m catching up on you age-wise. 😦
Each year, the non-birthday-girl would be planning and plotting online, as well as real-life, surprises. We had hand-made wrapping paper and all sorts of exotic and non-exotic gifts. Right now, I’m wearing a cozy robe from a zillion years ago.
Way back in 1998, when I was learning web design, I posted a whole mini-site for that birthday. Unfortunately, html code no longer allows for the music to play, but I had carefully thought out tunes for each day. The page titles aren’t showing, either.
- The main page title was “Happy Millenium Birthday, Alice!” and played a simple Happy Birthday
- The theme to Perry Mason aka “Peri MasonPause” on the “Flora” page
- the “Born” page had the theme to Alice’s Restaurant with no special title
- the “Robert Redford” page had The Way We Were. The title was “To Alice, from Bob (with lust)”
- the “musician and his music” page was Bach’s Toccata and Fugue and the title was “Happy Bachday, Alice!”
- the “flowers” page was The Rose with no special title
See that site here: http://www.oconnormusic.org/aliceBD/birthday.htm
The last page of that site was particularly important. I’d emailed all of Alice’s past guest speakers and other PS members and compiled this list of great wishes: http://www.oconnormusic.org/aliceBD/guests.htm
We’d be up at 12:01 am, posting wishes, decorating message boards and doing the final touches for websites.
In 2003, I’d apparently posted a picture of Flora Dora (again!) and Alice responded:
MaryO, what can I say other than that it was a wonderful and beautiful surprise to see my guest announcement area turned into a beautiful, sparkling birthday greeting — and Flora Dora, Power Surge’s mascot and RR — but especially your beautiful wishes.
I responded:
After all these years, it’s getting harder and harder to come up with new ideas for how to do an online surprise. There have been a variety of different things for different birthdays, but I have to keep you guessing I hope that you don’t mind that I’m holding the announcement area hostage for a little longer.
I’m sure that many of the newer people don’t know who Flora Dora is, but she’s an essential part of Power Surge so she have to be included somehow – kinda like inviting your maiden aunt to Thanksgiving 🙂 Of course, RR is welcome – anytime! I’m so glad that I could make an online surprise for you again this year – maybe I should start planning for NEXT year already.
I hope we share many more birthdays together as the close friends we’ve become over the years.
On a more serious side, you’re very welcome for the “beautiful wishes”. Sometimes, words fail me and I don’t do things justice, but you and Power Surge have changed my life in so many ways that go beyond “simple” menopause issues. When I first came to Power Surge on AOL, I was a confirmed lurker, reading only, never posting.
The first chat I tried to hide out until you asked me a question, encouraging me to talk. This was all so scary for me, communicating with others – online or off. I can say with confidence, that I’m no longer a lurker on the boards and in the chats like I was, and that was all your doing. Thanks so much for that!
Now I just have to work on my real life lurkership! The knowlege I got here in Power Surge, even when I was lurking, helped me so much with my menopause, my symptoms, my everyday life. Like most everyone else, I learned about the way to help my meno symptoms and I’m so thankful of that, that I could be feeling better.
When my husband was very sick, close to death, my first December in PS, I wouldn’t post, but I would come home from the hospital and read everything that other people were posting. It seemed so great to me, and it was such a comfort to me to know that everyone was out there. I recognized people’s names and enjoyed “listening” to the banter and chatter, and that gave me something other than the hospital and my own worries to think about. No matter what the time of day was, I could always read and see that things were ok with the world, and know that we were going to survive this. What a wonderful community Power Surge is!
Things have come along way since then. My husband made it, thanks to a skilled surgeon and a LOT of prayer. And I gradually changed, too. I’m obviously not afraid to post anymore, or go to chats, and I really have you to thank for that. Over the years there have been many changes, the boards have moved, been started again from scratch, updated, all kinds of things, as have the chats, but one thing remains clear and unchanged – and that Power Surge isn’t just another “website”. It is a true community for women in midlife, something we can gain daily strength from. (sorry about the preposition!)
And it’s all because of you, Dearest Alice Stamm. Thank you so much, and I hope it was a wonderful birthday – you deserve the very best!
Hugs and thanks from the bottom of my heart! Mary
From the message boards in 2004:
From 2005:
We have decided to let you accept the responsibilities of a 6 year old again.
If you want to sail sticks across a fresh mud puddle and make ripples with rocks, that’s great.
If you want to think M&Ms are better than money, because you can eat them, they are calorie-free (today only!).
If you want to lie under a big Oak tree next summer and run a lemonade stand with your friends (and fellow Surgettes) on a hot summers day, we’ll give you a voucher.
That summer-time voucher is also good for walking on the beach and thinking of the sand between your toes and the prettiest seashell you can find. Or you can spend the afternoon climbing trees and riding your bike.
We are returning you to a time when life was simple. When all you knew were colors, addition tables and simple nursery rhymes. But that didn’t bother you, because you didn’t know what you didn’t know and you didn’t care. When all you knew was to be happy because you didn’t know all the things that should make you worried and upset.
You’re going to go to school and have snack time, recess, gym and field trips.
You’ll be so happy, nothing will make you upset.
We’re going to let you think that the world is fair. That everyone in it is honest and good…that anything is possible.
For today, you’re going to be oblivious to the complexity of life and be overly excited by little things once again, returned to the days when reading was fun.
No worries about time, bills, websites that crash, guest chats where the guest can’t get in, excess email, time….No more worry about computer crashes, mountains of paperwork, depressing news, aches, pains, doctor visits or illness.
We’re going to help you believe in the power of smiles, hugs, a kind word, truth, justice, peace, health, dreams, the imagination, mankind and making angels in the snow.
You’re going to be 6 again, for today (and probably some of us will want to join you!). From all of us…
QUOTE (Dearest @ Nov 10 2005, 09:23 AM)
Thank you all for your warm and wonderful birthday wishes.
A very special thank you to my friend, MaryO, for the beautiful greeting, for including Power Surge’s mascot, Flora Dora at the top of the screen — and especially for allowing me to be six again even if only for a day 🙂
And I said:
You know, you can always apply for an extension of the day being 6. Click here to apply.
Glad you had a great birthday and much-needed vacation. If you want to extend either of those, please let me know and I’ll see if I can locate an extension for either of those.
Happy Post-Birthday!
In 2006, Alice said:
Thank you ALL for your wonderful birthday wishes and beautiful sentiments about how much Power Surge means to and has done for you. That makes all the years of work that’s gone into this “community” worthwhile (with, perhaps, the exception of dealing with HACKERSSSSSSSSSSS!!!!!) 🙂
I don’t know some of you very well. Others I know well and have established lovely friendships with. You know who you are. Thank you, too, for your beautiful flowers, birthday cards, online greetings, etc.
And thank you, my dear friend, MaryO, for starting this topic and for being the sister I never had 🙂 I’m so glad I impulsively decided to give myself a birthday present last month and called saying, “C’mon, let’s go to see Streisand!!” That was the highlight of my/our year. To be sitting so close to her, and SO close to and watching people mingle like: Bill and Hillary Clinton, Lauren Bacall, James Brolin, Katie Couric, Stephen Sondheim, Rosie O’Donnell, Sting, Hugh Jackman, Steven Spielberg, Regis and Joy Philbin, Sara Jessica Parker — and many, many others.
It was like the first time we met a few years ago and stopped into a restaurant only to find a few minutes later that Gena Rowlands, Ben Gazzara, Peter Bogdonovich, Carol Kane and others, whose names elude me at the moment, came in and sat at the table next to us. Knowing me, I had to go over and talk to them, especially Gena Rowlands, who’s still beautiful and elegant and was so gracious.
The past few years, starting with my emergency surgery and all the ensuing complications, my mom’s fall down the stairs and subsequent need for constant care, my dad passing away only four months later and my own ongoing and confusing health issues — too much stress.
The past few months have been better — we’ve both been through a LOT this year especially!
Special thanks to those of you who’ve generously given donations (some of you even more than once) to the site to help defray some of the expenses of running it.
I’m grateful to be alive and very proud of Power Surge and all the women (and men) it’s helped over the years plus all the wonderful women who participate in it 🙂
Alice
And I responded:
To be sitting so close to her…
You mean me…or Barbra? LOL
It was so amazing how that trip worked out. It was the most spontaneous thing I had ever done.
My son was home from grad school for “fall break” formerly known as Columbus Day weekend. He was flying back on Wednesday, through JFK.
After Alice got the tickets for Barbra on Monday (amazing in itself), I was able to get on Michael’s flight to JFK – only one trip to the airport! The flight number was the same as Alice’s street address. Do I hear Twilight Zone music?
What a great birthday gift you got for yourself – thank you so much for sharing it with me 🙂
Happy post-birthday!
From 2007
The top header on the boards:
Followed by
And Alice said…
Firstly, {{{{{MaryO}}}}, my old and dear friend, thank you for starting this topic and for the beautifully creative graphic and sentiments you made for my birthday. I don’t have to tell you what your friendship has meant to me all these years (you already know). Hugs!
Thank you all for your good wishes. Someone wrote to me, “I hope you had a peaceful birthday.” That’s exactly what it was . . . peaceful.
Thank you also for your kind words about Power Surge. It’s been a labor of love for 14 years . . . about to start its 15th year Feb. 3rd, 2008. I have a pretty good idea how many women’s lives have been impacted by this “community.” In all these years, including the start-up years on America Online, I’ve probably posted in the area of 100,000 messages on the numerous PS message boards. I can’t post as much as I used to any longer for many reasons, but I’m always working in the background to maintain this site that’s become a tremendous source of information and haven of support for all the visitors who come to it every day.
What started out as a blank page in an HTML editor has grown to exactly what I’d planned. I’m very proud of every facet of Power Surge including this message board.
Finally, thank you to all those who have made donations to Power Surge. I have thanked each and every one of you individually. Your donations have been helpful in defraying some of the ever-increasing costs involved with running Power Surge.
Again, thank you.
Best,
Dearest
Then, 2008
And that’s enough for this year. I have to save some out 🙂
~~~
So, it’s 15 years since I made that first silly website. I’m still scrambling to get something to post by 12:01 am for your birthday.
I still can’t believe that you won’t be reading this later, calling me when UPS / amazon / FEDex arrives with gifts so we can open them “together”.
We’ve said it once, we’ve said it dozens of times. Even when we’re apart we’re
I had posted earlier about the first part of the garden, which was suggested my my pastor. He saw the post on Facebook and thought it was great that I followed through.
We talked a bit about Alice’s Garden at the last church staff meeting and someone mentioned a “Butterfly Bush”. I’d never heard of that but it sounded interesting.
A week ago today we were at a CD release party for that same pastor’s band (JC Reigns) and one of the staff members had bought me a butterfly bush that very day. It was still in Joyce’s car so we brought it home.
Tom spent part of the afternoon making a new place for this plant. Right now, there is one flower on it.
Here’s Tom planting it, and in its new home next to a gold dust croton.
And, so I don’t forget…
Want a guaranteed butterfly and hummingbird magnet? Or, one of the most fragrant of shrubs? Plant a buddleia (butterfly bush).
This fast-growing, deciduous shrub with long, arching shoots will reach heights of 6 to 8 feet. Although the green leaves add a welcome bit of color to any landscape, it is the masses of blossoms—long, seductively spiked trusses—that are special. From summer to autumn, the butterfly bush bears dense panicles, 12 inches or more long, that fill the air with a fruity scent.
At its northern limits, the shrubs can die back, sometimes all the way to the ground. No matter. Butterfly bush is vigorous and undemanding and will send up new shoots, given a sunny location and average garden soil.
Note: Butterfly bush can be an invasive species in some areas; check with your local cooperative extension before planting.
Planting
- Buddleias need full sun and fertile, well-drained soil.
- Plant in spring or fall.
- Loosen the soil, mix in compost, and dig a hole twice the diameter of the plant container.
- When placing the plant in the hole, the top of the rootball should be level with the soil surface
- Space plants 5 to 10 feet apart, depending on the variety.
- Water thoroughly.
Care
- Water freely when in growth and sparingly otherwise. In the summer, water if rainfall is less than 1 inch per week.
- Avoid fertilizing butterfly bush; too much fertility supports leaf growth over flower production.
- Remove spent flower spikes to encourage new shoots and flower buds.
- Each spring, apply a thin layer of compost and mulch to retain moisture and control weeds.
- In cold Northern climates, spread mulch up to 6 inches deep around the trunk to nurture it through the winter.
- Buddleias are very late to break dormancy, so don’t be in a hurry to assess winter damage.
- The bush should bloom abundantly even in its first year. In warmer climates, the bushes will grow into trees and develop rugged trunks that peel; peeling is normal.
- In the northern limit of their range, they behave as herbaceous perennials, dying back to the root in cold winters.
- Since they bloom on new wood, even if there is no die-back, cut them back to the ground every spring. Even where winters are mild enough for the stems to survive, prune severely to stimulate abundant growth on which flowers are borne.
From http://www.almanac.com/plant/butterfly-bush
Love you, Alice!
I was going through old email and found this from 2009. Some of the information is old and some of the links may not work anymore but it’s still a good letter 🙂
This is a one-time mailing to introduce you to and guide you around the award-winning Power Surge Community for women at Midlife. You won’t receive masses of E.mail. We all get too much E.mail as it is. In fact, due to all the spam and anti-spam programs today, the Newsletters have been archived and are available for your convenience.
I realize this is a long letter, but menopause is a LONG process! It’s essential to educate yourself about menopause, about the remedies, tips and various methods of treating menopause symptoms to spare you as much discomfort as possible during this stage of life. I recommend spending 10 minutes of your time reading the information provided in this letter and saving it as a reference. Having created and maintained this community since 1993, I know it blind-folded, so I’ve provided information and direct links to the most important places first, and then you can explore on your own 🙂
I’m Alice Lotto Stamm, aka Dearest, founder of Power Surge. It’s important to know the quality and reputation of the site you’re visiting and depending upon for accurate information.
It’s my personal pleasure to welcome you to this community (created on America Online in 1993) for women at midlife and in menopause celebrating its 16th year online — the only menopause community with such longevity — and as a multi award-winning Web site since 1996. Power Surge contains a wealth of information and resources, and is internationally praised as a powerful support community for women — It is rated the most popular menopause site by Amazon.com‘s, Alexa; a Forbes Magazine“Best of the Web“ site, Forbes says, “Power Surge is one of the top sites for women looking for support and education during a turning point in their lives, menopause;” has consistently, since 1996, been the #1 and only reviewed menopause site in the Yahoo! directory; is called by Health Magazine, “One of the 25 best health sites for women; Prevention Magazine says, “Power Surge is an internet lifesaver;” the April, 2005 issue of Today’s Christian Woman recommends in their “Managing Menopause” article — “For cutting-edge meno-info, visit the leading website, Power-surge.com; the Spring, 2004 issue of Living Fit Magazine calls Power Surge “The premier online community/resource for midlife women — a decade on the cutting edge;” MORE Magazine praises Power Surge as a successful mentor site for women in menopause, Dr. Chris Northrup says, “This site is invaluable.” Dr. Susan Love, among many other medical luminaries, says, “Power Surge is the first, best and most informative menopause site for women.” A small sampling of newspaper and magazine articles about Power Surge.
However, the most important praise comes from the *women* (and men) who’ve visited and participated in Power Surge. A Sampling of women’s and men’s testimonials can be read here.
Now… About YOU!
I know you’re concerned about and interested in learning more about menopause and related midlife issues — in what’s happening that’s suddenly turning your life upside down. Yes, menopause is a “natural” experience, but as natural as it may be, it can be sheer misery. Although menopause isn’t an illness to cure, for many women it can be a great deal of discomfort to endure. Menopause sometimes feels as though a woman, one day vibrant, energetic, feeling fine, suddenly finds herself feeling as though she’s physically and emotionally trying to pull herself through the eye of a needle.
Among women in menopause, it’s common to hear things like, “I don’t know what’s wrong with me. I feel worse than I’ve ever felt in my life!” “Am I losing my mind?” — “My body feels like it’s betraying me!” — “How long does this last? — “Am I ever going to feel normal again?” . . . Well, it does end eventually, but it can take quite a few years. Remember, you’ve been having a menstrual cycle for years. It doesn’t go away overnight and for many women, it often it goes out with a ROAR!
Remember, too, that menopause doesn’t happen in a vacuum. Everything in our lives is connected. Whatever we had to cope with physically prior to menopause is frequently exacerbated BY menopause. Whatever emotional issues we had before often feel like they’re pushing us to the edge of our patience, and cause us to wonder if we possess the ability to endure what can be long and tedious transitional years. Equally, whatever relationship problems we had with our spouses/partners/children/parents/co-workers can all become exaggerated, often intolerable while we’re coping with all these changes. For many, menopause can be so overwhelming, they find themselves turning to almost anything for comfort — their spiritual natures becoming more fine tuned than ever. I know it’s difficult not to become disillusioned, but patience is something you must learn in order to get past this experience and move on to the next stage in life.
Because menopause touches so many areas of our lives, in Power Surge we address not only the physical “changes” associated with menopause, but the psychological and spiritual, empty nest syndrome, relationships at midlife, weight gain, intimacy, nutrition, diet and fitness issues and how to cope with our aging parents while we’re being tested to the max. We address the whole nine yards about “getting older.” Believe it or not, many women find themselves going into menopause loathing the idea of losing their period AND getting older, but I can promise you one thing, once you’ve found a method of treatment that helps your symptoms and once you’re over this passage, you’ll welcome becoming postmenopausal and getting older.
So, pour yourself a cup of relaxing herbal tea (without caffeine) while you click on the blue links that will help you navigate to and around Power Surge. You’ve *finally* found the most supportive community to answer all your questions and unparalleled support to help you through this passage 🙂 And “community” is what it’s all about! You’ll find a list of convenient links at the bottom of this welcome letter.
Navigating the Power Surge Web Site:
Once on the main page of the Web site, you can click on various links on the “Menu” at the top of the page, or throughout the page, OR you can use the handy site map.
Guest Announcements and Monthly Newsletters:
You’re receiving this E.mail because you’ve either registered for the message boards, or signed up for the mailing list directly. If you’re receiving this for some other reason, you can sign up for the mailing list by one of the above two methods to receive weekly announcements of prestigious guest experts who visit Power Surge to answer your questions and the bi-monthly Power Surge newsletter. Your E.Mail address and personal information will be kept private and used only for the Power Surge mailings. Power Surge has a very strict privacy policy.
It’s a BIG Place – WHERE Do I BEGIN?
I recommend starting with What Is Power Surge About? It will give you an idea of the purpose of this community, where you are, where you’re going, and why I created Power Surge back in 1993.
There’s a wealth of information on the Web site, so sometimes it’s difficult to know where to begin. What with hundreds of guest transcripts, informative and motivational articles, newsletters, message boards (see list of links below). Here are a few sample articles from Educate Your Body: There are many, many more articles to read, but these are the best to start with:
- Menopause Survival Tips
- A Menopause Primer – What Is Menopause And What Are The Symptoms?
- What’s A Hot Flash?
- Selecting A Healthcare Practitioner
- Naturally Compounded, Bioidentical Hormones
- Recommendations for Treating Menopause Symptoms
- Menopause, Libido, Vaginal Dryness/Relationship
- About Your Hormones
- Hair Loss And Thinning
- Tips For Menopause-Related Dry Skin
- The Signs of Menopause:Tests To Ask For
- Phytoestrogens, An Exciting Alternative
- Sleep Disorders / Insomnia During Menopause
Many women are more confused than ever since the most current controversy surrounding synthetic HRT (hormone replacement therapy), such as Premarin and Provera (Prempro), so you may want to begin with this information I’ve compiled regarding the important issue of the HRT Controversy. Power Surge has *never* endorsed synthetic hormones, but only bio-identical, natural, plant-derived hormones for women desiring to use hormone supplementation. Everything Power Surge has been concerned about regarding the synthetics was brought to light with the abrupt halting of the (WHI) Women’s Health Initiative Study in 2002.
A wealth of information can be found in the Recommendations area; Educate Your Body Library, the Newsworthy Articles; Guest Transcripts; Resources; Newsletters and on the very active and supportive Web site Message Boards. You’ll find all these links at the bottom of this E.mail.
Recommendations:
A very popular area is the Recommendations page, replete with various methods of treatments for your particular menopause issues — soy isoflavones, herbs, vitamins, minerals, amino acids, anti-oxidants, naturally compounded, bioidentical hormones and numerous other suggestions can be found on this comprehensive list. Don’t be overwhelmed!No one is expected to use everything in the recommendations area. and Being The Best You area. You select what you need to deal with your personal issues. Every woman is different. You discover what works best for your symptoms. Everything you’ll find recommendations page is natural. Power Surge recommends nothing without first trying it. As most women will soon find out, finding the right method of treatment involves trial and error. Sometimes, in severe cases, there may be times when certain medications may become necessary to get you “over the hump” of the depression and/or anxiety often associated with menopause.
Message Boards
There is no shortage of Power Surge message boards where you’ll find support on every imaginable subject and camaraderie with other women going through similar experiences. The Web site message boards have been rated by Forbes Magazine as the “Best of the Web Menopause Boards.” Women can network 24/7 to read, post and engage in real-time chat with other women in menopause in the Insta-Chat. The subjects cover a host of subjects. Registration is required to participate in the Power Surge Message Boards for the purpose of keeping out multi-level marketing people whose only purpose is to clutter the boards with advertisements. The boards are a haven for friendship, information and support.
Chats
Power Surge is the only menopause site that for 14 years has had regular guest chats in the area of menopause, women’s health and midlife-related issues. Every Thursday night, I host guest chats at 9:15 PM, ET in the Power Surge chat room where YOU have the opportunity to interact with medical luminaries and women’s health experts you wouldn’t likely have the opportunity to chat with about your menopause issues. Power Surge also gives away free books and/or gifts at the guest chats. For information about the guest chats, click here for the guest schedule. The Web chat and Insta-Chat chat on the message board are open 24/7, 365 days a year. Use them whenever you wish.
Transcripts of Guest Chats and Newsletters
There are hundreds of wonderfully informative transcripts of hundreds of prominent guest experts who’ve appeared in Power Surge’s guest chats, a very small sampling of whom are: Dr. Robert Atkins, Dr. Susan Love, Dr. Christiane Northrup, Dr. Isadore Rosenfeld, Dr. Bob Arnot, Dr. John Lee, Dr. Susan Rako (The Hormone of Desire), Dr. Elizabeth Vliet (Screaming To Be Heard); Dr. Pamela Peeke; Authors, Gail Sheehy (The Silent Passage), Rona Jaffe, Nancy Friday, Lonnie Barbach (The Pause), Health Educators, Judith Sachs, Nutritionist, Ann Louse Gittleman, Linda Ojeda; Fitness gurus, Denise Austin, Kathy Smith; Actress, Linda Dano; Relationship Experts, Steven Carter (Men Who Can’t Love), Barbara De Angelis and hundreds more! They can be found in the Transcript Library . Next to each guest’s name is their area of expertise. You might even find it easier going through the Guest Schedule which includes short bios of guests since 2000 and links to their transcripts. For comprehensive newsletters, articles, FAQ’s, resources of relevance to women in menopause, visit the Power Surge Reading Room
Ask The Experts
A very popular area on the Web site is Ask The Power Surge Experts. Power Surge is renowned for the experts with which it associates because… We Believe Only In The *Best*
OB-GYN, Ask Gynecologist, Phillip Warner, M.D. an OB-GYN with years of experience, whose area of expertise is women, menopause and who does not believe in synthetic hormones. Dr. Warner has spoken out for years against Premarin and Prempro, the synthetic estrogen and estrogen/progestin combo derived from horse urine.
Psychiatrist and Neurologist, Anxiety, panic , depression and stress-related medical conditions doctor, Ask Stuart Shipko, M.D., a board-certified Psychiatrist and Neurologist, founder of The Panic Disorders Institute and author who has treated more than 2500 patients with panic attacks/disorder and whose practice focuses on anxiety, panic, depression and stress-related medical conditions.
Intimacy expert, Ask Dr. Sandy Scantling — a clinical psychologist and author whose practice focuses on intimacy and sexuality problems which frequently occur during the transitional years.
Weight Issues expert, Ask Dr. Denise Lamothe — a clinical psychologist who’s area of expertise is eating disorders. Dr. Lamothe is the author of the book, The Taming Of The Chew.
Before posting a question to our experts, I suggest you check each expert’s area’s archived answers, plus there’s a search in each expert’s area if you’re looking for specific information.
Books For Women At Midlife and in Menopause
A comprehensive list of recommended books can be found in the Power Surge Bookstore. The list can be a bit overwhelming to newcomers, so here’s Power Surge’s list of favorite menopause books. New books are always being added.
Site-wide Search
The Web-site search engine contains a very comprehensive search feature where you can not only search the entire Web site, but individual areas, such as the guest transcripts, newsletters, articles sections and the individual experts in the “ask the experts” areas. A handy “tip” I’ve learned from years of using search engines is to locate exactly what I’m looking for when there’s more than one word, such as “hot flashes,” to put the phrase inside “quotation marks.” This works well with all search engines as well.
Contact Us
If you need any help, feel free to: Contact the Power Surge Team. Please make certain you select the right contact person.
Important About Your Privacy & E.mail:
Because there is so much spam mail these days, Power Surge chooses to protect your privacy by sending its mailings BCC (blind carbon copies). In this way, others on the list can’t see your address. We have no way of knowing if someone who has subscribed to our mailing list is looking to harvest E.mail addresses for marketing their products or selling addresses and bombarding you with E.mail. However, because our mailings are sent BCC, many ISP’s (Internet Service Providers), may interpret it as “spam” mail and may drop Power Surge mail into a “spam” or “junk” mail folder even though it’s something to which you’ve subscribed. Therefore, you may want to check your spam/junk mail folders for Power Surge newsletters. If you don’t receive our weekly mailings, you might try contacting your ISP to find out why you’re not receiving it.
AOL User E.mail Information:
In AOL versions 8.0 and 9.0, AOL is providing anti-spam features, where it allows you to configure E.mail you wish to receive. If you wish to receive the Power Surge mailings, it will be necessary to add PowerSurgeWoman@aol.com to the mail you accept, or it will be treated as spam and you may never see it.
Convenient Links
Power Surge has many areas. Here are some convenient links to help you navigate Power Surge and find all the information you’re seeking:
Power Surge has many areas. Here are some convenient links to help you navigate Power Surge and find all the information you’re seeking:
- Stop By And Meet Dearest
- Power Surge Recommendations
- Web site Message Boards & Insta-chat
- Ask The Experts
- Power Surge Live! Web Chat
- Guest Schedule
- Guest Chat Transcripts
- Educate Your Body
- Resources, Newsletters, FAQ’s
- Newsworthy Articles
- Power Surge In The News
- Being The Best You!
- Your Feedback
- The Poll Vault
- Testimonials
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- he Women of Power Surge
- The Male Point of View
- Sign up for the mailing list
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- Contact the Power Surge Team
- Site Map
(You can unsubscribe from the mailing list at the bottom of
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I can’t tell you how pleased I am that you’ve found Power Surge. I know you will garner excellent information, strength and support from this multi award-winning community, plus make wonderful friends with other women going through the same transition.
We’ve been here for 15 years helping to empower women to take charge of their bodies. So, as we sojourn through this transition, some of us in our own little cocoons, remember — “If nothing ever changed, there’d be no butterflies.” 🙂
Power Surge
In Our 16th Year informing & supporting women through menopause!
Alice Stamm
(aka Dearest / PowerSurgeWoman)
The Power Surge Community For Women
At Midlife And In Menopause
Celebrating Our 16th Year Online
http://www.power-surge.com
Founder, Facilitator
E.Mail: Dearest@aol.com
* FORBES Magazine: “Best of the Web”
(featured in cover article on the accuracy of
Internet Health sites, “Use With Care”)
* LIVING FIT Magazine’s Spring, 2004 Issue calls
Power Surge, “The premier online community/resource
for midlife women — a decade on the cutting edge”
* HEALTH Magazine selected Power Surge
one of “The 25 Best Health Sites for Women”
* PREVENTION Magazine: “Power Surge is an
Internet Lifesaver”
* SUSAN LOVE, M.D.: “Power Surge is the first, the
best and most informative menopause site for women”
* TODAY’S CHRISTIAN WOMAN: April, 2005 article,
“Managing Menopause,” says, “For cutting-edge
meno-info, visit the leading website, Power Surge.”
* CBS Healthwatch: “Power Surge has had a
powerful effect on the mental and physical
health of women”
* MORE Magazine praises Power Surge as a
“Valuable Menopause Mentor” in its April, 2003 issue
* CHICAGO TRIBUNE: “If your mom’s not around to offer
advice on hot flashes as you enter menopause, head for
a Web site called Power Surge.”
Copyright 1994-2009 Power-Surge.com, Inc.
All Rights Reserved
Reproduction in whole or part without permission is prohibited.
Soon after Alice died, I went to talk to my pastor. He suggested that I grow a corner or part of a garden in Alice’s memory.
There is no way I can kneel or get down on the ground to tend to something like this so we decided on a large planter on a rolling platform so it can be wherever the sun is.
This is on the deck, next to my reading chair.
We have had a lot of rain lately – I’m not sure what it’s going to do to the 100 bulbs under the surface, waiting to bloom at different times next spring, summer and fall.
As the seasons change, I hope to be able to share beautiful flowers each week.
From Power Surge, written by Dearest
Bone health is a primary concern for women as they advance in age. Bone is a dynamic, living tissue subject to breakdown, repair, and rebuilding, like any other tissue in the body. Bone loss occurs when the rate of bone dissolution exceeds that of bone formation. Women actually achieve maximal bone density by their mid-thirties. In fact, skeletal bone mass naturally starts to decrease after about age 40, so it is never too early to address bone health. In addition, research has shown that it is never too late to begin preventative steps against excessive bone loss.
For many women and their health care providers, concern about bone loss is one of the main arguments for supplementing with estrogen. Estrogen replacement, however, brings with it its own concerns, and is only part of the story when it comes to bone health. Estrogen can inhibit the cells whose job it is to break bone down. This means estrogen slows down the rate of bone loss, but it will not build new bone. Testosterone and progesterone, however, appear to stimulate the cells that build bone, thereby possibly stimulating bone growth.
Hormones play a pivotal role in the process of remodeling bone, but several vitamins and minerals are indispensable for optimal bone health as well. The formation of healthy bone has two fundamental aspects: First to increase bone mass, and second to create a healthy infrastructure (known as the bone matrix) around which bone can form. Supplementing with key nutrients, along with a balanced diet and exercise program, are integral to any regime for promoting the health of your bones.
The proper nutrition for bone health goes beyond simply supplementing with calcium. Calcium deficiency may only contribute to 25% of all incidences of heightened bone loss. The form of calcium used is also important. Studies to determine the recommended daily intake of 1200-1500 mg for menopausal women used calcium carbonate. Calcium carbonate is a form of calcium our bodies may find difficult to absorb, particularly in an environment that is low in stomach acid. In addition, this recommendation includes calcium derived from dietary sources. Most women eating a standard American diet get about 700 mg of calcium from food intake. Calcium as an amino acid chelate is currently the most absorbable form of calcium available. As we age, we tend toward hypochlorhydria (low stomach acid). Calcium amino acid chelate does not require an acidic environment for absorption, but it is a good idea to supplement with a bone health formula that includes hydrochloric acid, as it can aid in the absorption of calcium and other nutrients from the diet.
Magnesium is important for the formation of a functional bone matrix. In addition, magnesium converts vitamin D to its active form, D3. This is imperative for calcium absorption. Many women with poor bone health may be deficient in the active form of vitamin D. Menopausal women in general tend also to be deficient in magnesium. Folic acid and vitamin B6 (pyridoxine) together perform a vital role in engendering the health of bone tissue. They help the body metabolize and excrete a substance known as homocysteine. High homocysteine levels are associated with defective bone formation (and, incidentally, with cardiovascular disease). Interestingly enough, menopausal women show an impaired ability to metabolize and excrete homocysteine. Furthermore, they tend as a group to be low in folic acid and vitamin B6.
Manganese, silicon, and vitamin K are all necessary for the construction of the bone matrix around which bone mineralization occurs. Vitamin K is another nutrient that is found to be low in individuals with significant bone loss. Too much vitamin K can potentially interfere with blood clotting, so it is important not to exceed approximately 200 micrograms a day of this nutrient.
Zinc and copper are also important minerals for bone health that tend to be low in menopausal women. Both minerals enhance the effectiveness of vitamin D, which promotes the absorption of calcium. Zinc and copper must be supplemented in the appropriate ratio, as imbalances may affect the proper formation of bone. Supplementation with the micronutrient boron has been shown to reduce calcium loss in post-menopausal women. Vitamin C is well known for its role in immune support, but it is also a crucial nutrient that the body needs to build bone matrix and healthy connective tissue. Vitamin C deficiencies are widespread, even with those ingesting the full RDA.
Increasing evidence points to a link between soy intake and bone health. Most of the studies that suggest dietary soy intake is associated with a decrease in the rate of bone loss are either epidemiological or based on an animal model. The amount of soy actually required for this positive effect on bone health is still undetermined. One important study that was conducted on postmenopausal women concluded the amount of isoflavones (the phytoestrogenic component of soy) needed to slow down the rate of bone loss is between 55 and 90 mg/day for at least 6 months.
Ipriflavone is a synthetic isoflavone derivative. Ipriflavone has been shown to inhibit the rate of bone loss and promote bone formation in postmenopausal women, particularly in the spine and wrist. As noted, there are many key nutrients vital for the health of our bones. A comprehensive program that encompasses proper diet, nutritional supplementation, and exercise may prove to be invaluable in preventing or minimizing bone loss.
Burnell JM, Baylink DJ, Chestnut CH, and Teubner, EJ. “The role of skeletal calcium deficiency in postmenopausal osteoporosis.” Calcif Tissue Int. 1986; 38(4):187-92.
Recker RR. “Calcium absorption and achlorhydria.” N Engl J Med 1985; 313(2):70-3.
Ivanovich P, Fellows H, and Rich C. “The absorption of calcium carbonate.” Ann. Intern. Med. 1967; 66(5): 917-23.
Heaney RP. “Absorbability of calcium sources: the limited role of solubility.” Calcif Tissue Int.1990; 46:300-304.
Blumenthal N, Betts F, and Posner A. “Stabilization of amorphous calcium phosphate by Mg and ATP.” Calcif Tis Res 1977;23:245-50.
Shikari M, Kushida K, Yamazaki K, et al. “Effect of 2 year’s treatment of osteoporosis with 1 alpha-hydroxy vitamin D3 on bone mineral density and incidence of fracture: a placebo-controlled, double-blind prospective study.” Endocr J 1996; 43(2):211-20.
Editorial. “Vitamin D Supplementation in the elderly.” Lancet 1987; 1(8528): 306-7
Brattstrom L, Hultbnerg B,and Mardebo J. “Folic acid responsive postmenopausal homocysteinemia.” Metab 1985;34:1073-1077.
Masse P, Vuilleumier J P, and Weiser H. “Is pyridoxine an essential nutrient for bone?” Int. J. Vitam Nutr Res 1988;58(3):295-9.
Joosten E, van den Berg A, Riezler R, et al. “Metabolic evidence that deficiencies of vitamin B12, folate, and vitamin B6 occur commonly in elderly people”. Am J Clin Nutr 1993;58(4):468-76(addendum 1994; 60(1):147).
Carlisle EM, “Biochemical and morphological changes associated with long bone abnormalities in silicon deficiency.” J Nutr 1980;110(5):1046-56.
Leach Jr R, Meunster A, and Wien E. “I. Studies on the role of manganese in bone formation. II Effect upon chondroitin sulfate synthesis in chick epiphyseal cartilage.” Arch Biochem Biophy 1969;133(1): 22-28.
Hart JP, Shearer MJ, Klenerman L, et al. “Electrochemical detection of depressed circulating levels of vitamin K1 in osteoporosis.” J Clin Endocrinol Metab 1985;60(6):1268-9.
Calhoun N, Smith J, Jr. and Becker K. “The effects of zinc on ectopic bone formation.” Oral Surg 1975;39(5):698-706.
Wilson,T, Katz JM, and Gray DH. “Inhibition of active bone resorption by copper.” Calcif Tissue Int 1981;33(1):35-9.
Yamaguchi M, and Sakashita T. “Enhancement of vitamin D3 effect on bone metabolism in weaning rats orally administered zinc sulphate.” Acta Endocrinol 1986;111(2):285-8.
Holden JM, Wolf WR, and Mertz W. “Zinc and Copper in self-selected diets.” J AM Diet Assoc 1979;75(1):23-8.
Nielsen F. “Boron – an overlooked element of potential nutritional importance.” Nutr Today 1988 Jan/Feb:4-7.
Hyams D, and Ross E. “Scurvy, megaloblastic anaemia and osteoporosis.” Br J Clin Pract 1963;17:334-40.
Kalu DN, Masoro EJ, Yu BP, et al. “Modulation of age-related hyperparathyroidism and senile bone loss in Fischer rats by soy protein and food restriction.” Endocrinology 1988;122:1847-1854.
Brandi ML. “Natural and synthetic isoflavones in the prevention and treatment of chronic diseases.” Calcif Tissue Int. 1997;61(7):5-8.
Erdman J, Stillman R, Lee K, and Potter S. “Short-term effects of soybean isoflavones on bone in postmenopausal women.” Second International Symposium on the Role of Soy in Preventing and Treating Chronic Disease. Brussels, Belgium, 1996.
Agnusdei D, Crepaldi G, Mazzuoli G, et al. ” A double blind, placebo-controlled trial of ipriflavone for prevention of postmenopausal spinal bone loss.” Calcif Tissue Int. 1997;61(2):142-7.
Adami S, Bufalino L, Cervetti R, et al. “Ipriflavone prevents radial bone loss in postmenopausal women with low bone mass over 2 years.” Osteoporosis Int. 1997;792);119-25.
By Power-Surge contributor:
Dr. Holly Zapf
by Dearest
Women “pausing” in Power Surge often ask one another what remedies they’ve used to address their menopausal issues. I had the good fortune to be made aware of nutrition early on in life by my dearest friend and savvy mother, Anne, who went through a difficult menopause and prepared me for what to expect. The general consensus is that your menopause is likely to be similar to your mother’s menopausal experience.
I was astonished when she told me that she had menopause-related high cholesterol of 400, which she lowered only with soy lecithin — 40+ years ago. She’s 95 today. That’s when I started researching ways of naturally lowering cholesterol and exploring the many benefits of soy protein and isoflavones.
Realisitcally, like you, I do not live on vitamins alone. I don’t buy organic foods. I eat the wrong things more often than I should, and oftentimes the joints ache too much to exercise. Do the best you can because nobody can help YOU through this transition as much as yourself!
Read, educate yourself, ask questions and learn tips that will help you “survive” this transition of life.
Time-Tested TIPS from Power Surge. You’ll find specific remedies in the recommendations area.
Menopause is a time fraught with physical, hormotional and spiritual changes.
For those concerned with weight loss, perimenopause is hardly the time for strict dieting. You have enough on your plate already (no pun intended). It’s enough to cope with the extreme hormonal upheavals. However, one can and should try to observe the best eating and exercise habits because they can be extremely helpful during peri and postmenopause, and can help to eliminate many of the problems you experience and form the foundation for a healthy future. It’s wise to begin a mild strength-training program to prevent muscle and bone degeneration later in life.
Did you know that exercise is one of the most effective measures in lowering cholesterol? Lowering your LDL (the ‘bad’ cholesterol) and raising your HDL (the ‘good’ cholesterol) AND lowering your triglycerides, too!
Did you also know that a few minutes of exercise can stop a panic attack dead in its tracks? Reduce anxiety? Decrease and even eliminate depression? Exercise does more than boost your mood and energy level, it also has a long-lasting calming effect. You don’t need elaborate equipment or gyms. The best equipment you have is your own body. Studies show that people feel less anxious while they are exercising and then for the next several hours. You don’t need to do an hour of heavy aerobics. A review of dozens of studies determined that you need to exercise for only 20 minutes for this natural tranquilizer to kick in. It’s a known fact that the best exercise is walking — even a twenty minute walk a day. The important thing is “consistency.” So, if you do 20 minutes of exercise even three times a week, it can be instrumental in establishing optimal health and, yes, lessening the severity of menopausal symptoms.
Brown Bagging It! Increased anxiety, hyperventilating and even panic attacks are common complaints during the perimenopausal years. You’ll find numerous suggestions all over the site about how to handle anxiety/panic. Sure, there are herbs, vitamins, tranquilizers, antidepressants and the exercise mentioned above. However, Power Surge also recommends brown bagging it, especially in emergency situations. You ask, “What is brown bagging it?”
Get yourself a small paper bag. Squish (yes, squish) the top together as though you were going to POP IT! Take the gathered top part of the bag and place it tightly over your nose and mouth, preventing outside air from getting in. Now, inhale deeply! When you feel you can’t inhale anymore, inhale just a little… bit … more. Next, slowly… exhale … and when you feel there’s no breath left … exhale just a little … bit … more. Do this for no longer than 30 seconds and see how you feel. Should you feel light-headed, don’t continue. However, most people have no problems and can do this exercise for one minute. The idea behind this is that by breathing into the paper bag, you’re inhaling carbon dioxide, which serves as a relaxant to your body’s organs, rather than oxygen which acts as a stimulant. Therefore, this exercise can be excellent for palpitations, anxiety, hyperventilation and general stress. Carry a brown bag in your purse. Stick one in your car’s glove compartment. You’ll be amazed at how simple and effective this procedure is!
Speaking of palpitations, should they hit, try taking 500 mg. of magnesium. They say, “If it spasms, give it magnesium.” The same holds true for migraines. If you feel a migraine coming on, try 500 mg. magnesium. You’ll find more info about magnesium on the Recommendations page.
Take one aspirin tablet per day (325 mg., 1/2 a regular adult dose) as a natural anti-coagulant. Antiplatelet therapy reduces the risk of any serious vascular event by about one quarter; risk of non-fatal heart attack by one third, non-fatal stroke by one quarter, and vascular death by one sixth. If heart attack (or stroke) symptoms occur, take one aspirin immediately as its anti-coagulant effects can mean the difference between life and death.
Become more aware of nutrition — what you put into your body. The types of oils you use in cooking, the way you prepare your foods. Canola, Sunflower, Safflower and Olive oils are the best. Sunflower oil actually serves as a cleanser of your arteries to remove plaque and prevent more plaque from forming. Certain fats are good for your body, while others are bad.. As you are aging your skin, hair and nails are likely to become drier and more brittle and lose their natural oils. Moisturize your skin and deep-condition your hair. And eat lots of fruit and fiber.
Avoid processed foods, nicotine, caffeine, artificial sweetners and “junk” food. These are no-no’s for menopausal women. Try to cut down or, better yet, stop drinking carbonated drinks, especially diet sodas – and more especially, those made with aspertame (Nutrasweet). The carbonation can cause bloating. I can’t even begin to tell you what sort of side effects you can experience from aspertame and so many low-calorie foods are made with it. It wouldn’t surprise me if you stopped using aspertame and some of the symptoms you attributed to menopause disappeared.
Keep a journal. Journalling can be extremely useful. A suggestion — when you have a hot flash, mood swing, palpitations, bout of binge eating, sudden elevated anxiety, panic attack, or any number of repetitive behavioral problems, take a pen and paper (or treat yourself to an actual journal) and write down:
- What you were doing
- What you were thinking
- What you were feeling
- With whom you were interacting
- What they said to you
- What you ate just prior to the onset of the problem
… and anything else you can think of that might be useful in identifying your triggers.
By keeping a running journal of the ‘changes’ you experience, you’ll be able to identify those circumstances, foods, people, thoughts, activities that may have triggered the physical and emotional changes. Through examination, you can see if there’s a pattern to the emotional UPS and downs, you can utilize the process of elimination in pinpointing the cause of the problem! You can keep your own menopause blog/journal, a free feature when you sign up for the Power Surge Message Board.
Dress in thin layers. When a hot flash hits, you can peel off the top layer (without getting arrested) and wear cotton as it is the most absorbent and cool of all fibers.
Additional suggestions:
- Drink a glass of cold water or juice at the onset of a flash
- At night, keep a carafe or thermos of ice water or an ice pack alongside your bed
- Use cotton sheets, sleeping garments, lingerie, and clothing to let your skin “breathe”
Believe it or not, one of the quickest remedies for hot flashes and sweats is in your own refrigerator. Open the freezer and pull out a bag of frozen vegetables. Place it on your face, neck, inner arms and wrists. It’s refreshing and often can thwart a hot flash instantly. When unanticipated hot flashes or sweats hit, especially while travelling, a handy item to have is a mini portable personal fan. I’ve kept one in my glove compartment since I started perimenopause. It’s inexpensive and effective. Remember, this isn’t a taboo subject any longer. There’s no need to be embarrassed. It’s a natural occurrence. So, use your frozen veggies, or whip out your hand fan and, uncomfortable as it may be, try to find the humor in it. Everyone else will, too.
Eat lots of garlic!. Garlic is excellent for blood pressure and cholesterol. You can also take garlic in in a gel tablet – odorless, too. Also, eat lots of broccoli. It’s loaded with phytochemicals, vitamins and contains the highest amount of antioxidants than any other vegetable. Stacked with protective compounds , such as isothiocyanates and sulforaphane, as well as indole-3-carbinol (I3C), a substance that is said to have anticancer actions, broccoli tops the list of ‘must serves’. The entire Brassica family of vegetables, (which includes Brussels sprouts, cauliflower, cabbage, Chinese cabbage, bok choy, kale and collard greens), contains a compound that activates certain enzymes in the human body to protect cells from genetic damage.
Try adding cinnamon and ground flaxseed to your morning oatmeal. It’s been discovered that cinnamon is very effective in lowering hyptertension. Ground flaxseed blends nicely with oatmeal and is one of the most important things you should take. Flax is good for your heart, for maintaining healthy cholesterol and triglyceride levels, one of the “good fats” our bodies need, has anti-carcinogenic properties to protect us from various forms of cancer. Flaxseed is an excellent source of fiber and especially Omega 3 Fatty Acids. A 2 tablespoon serving provides 2400 mg of Omega 3. Read more about flaxseed.
When our estrogen levels dip, our cholesterol levels often become elevated. It’s not something to be alarmed about, but it is something to take action to treat. Your health care practitioner may immediately suggest going on statins, such as Lipitor, Zocor, etc., to lower your cholesterol. Remember, this is probably a temporary condition and there are many ways to lower cholesterol naturally before resorting to prescription drugs — especially getting involved in a regular exercise programl. See Power Surge’s Recommendations.
Avoid fried, rich, spicy foods and too much sugar. As we go through the menopause transition, women are more likely to develop heartburn, acid reflux, gallstones, so avoid spicy and fatty foods.
You know how we suddenly develop cravings for chocolate? They’ve said that chocolate is the “feel good” food – probably raising seratonin levels. However, while it may make us feel good for a short while, chocolate and all sweets can bring on hot flashes, raise insulin levels, cause palpitations, anxiety and even depression in some, so while everyone’s exalting chocolate to the sky, remember it’s not good for every peri and postmenopausal woman.
Avoid toxic situations and people! Menopause can be likened to Murphy’s Law — whenever anything can go wrong, it does! Our patience is tested to the max while we’re coping with all these changes. It seems all our demons, every unresolved issue of our life, hits us right between the eyes during perimenopause. We each know at least one someone who pushes all our wrong buttons. If you know certain situations or people are invariably going to cause you grief, do everything within your power to avoid them. Avoid inconsequential arguments. Many women who have passed through Power Surge have discussed issues with anxiety and anger — oftentimes, inappropriate anger — even feelings of rage. This isn’t uncommon during perimenopause while our hormones are ebbing and flowing, up and down until we feel like an alien has taken over our body. There are simple things you can use from the breathing exercises above to taking lots of vitamin B, especially inositol, which is known as “nature’s own tranquilizer.” Many women are helped by using St. John’s Wort. It’s not only good for depression, but helps anxiety as well. You’ll find numerous suggestions on the Recommendations page and in the Being The Best You area of the site. There’s also a very helpful article, A surprising new health tip: When you’re angry, let it show. Here’s a helpful article about anxiety.
Let the light in. Turn down the noise. Find a quiet, peaceful place to regroup, or simply to read, to sew, to relax, to be free from all the stresses of the world. Perhaps you can use that time to boot up the computer and share with other women going through the same thing as you! And, DO turn off the news! One of the most contributing factors to high stress levels is watching the local news. Whether you live alone, or with your family, explain that you need some time and space for yourself. If they love you, they’ll understand what you’re going through. Explain that it has nothing to do with them, but that you simply need to tune out some of those things that cause you to feel worse.
The bottom line: LEARN TO P-A-M-P-E-R yourself!
Look at all the “TO DO” lists you’ve accumulated! I recetly printed out just one of my to do lists and ended up with 15 printed pages. You know as well as I that many of the notations on your to do list have been there for weeks, maybe months (maybe years). I could wallpaper my entire house with all the post-its scattered about my computer room/office. IF you must keep appointments organized, put them in your cell phone’s notepad. If you don’t want or can’t afford an expensive cell phone/PDA, you can purchase a less expensive PDA such as the Palm z22 PDA or the Palm Tungsten E2 100.
If you drink alcoholic beverages, do so in moderation (a glass of red wine daily is good for your health). Once I entered perimenopause, I had to stop enjoying my glass of red wine because of the havoc it wreaked on my body. If you smoke, stop, or, at least, cut down to a minimum. You already know why without my telling you.
Alcoholic beverages can contribute to hot flashes and palpitations, plus raise your triglycerides as alcohol is converted to sugar in the body. Sugar and alcohol are two of the worst offenders during perimenopause and elevated triglycerides is one of the greatest contributors to heart disease.
High carbohydrate foods can also cause hot flashes, palpitations, anxiety and depression, plus elevated insulin levels which can exacerbate menopausal symptoms, plus too many carbohydrates can cause weight gain.
For the nausea often associated with perimenopause and PMS, try a cup of boiling water with 2-3 tsp. of lemon juice (from concentrated lemon juice). Sip it slowly and it should work like a charm every time. Ginger is also supposed to be helpful. However, using ginger itself may cause stomach problems. They say to add ginger to food, but really, who wants to eat when they feel nauseous? I would also recommend drinking some warm ginger ale (soda). You can also try peppermint or camomille tea, but not too much (I still prefer plain water and lemon).
Try to keep your sense of humor. I’ve always said in Power Surge, the moment we lose our sense of humor about life in general is the moment that life becomes unmanageable.
If you’re dealing with hair thinning and/or loss, there are some excellent tips in Hair Loss and Thinning at Menopause.
If you’re suffering from dry skin and other midlife and/or menopause-related skin disorders, you’ll find good information and tips in Tips for Midlife Dry Skin. There’s additional information about vaginal dryness here.
It’s really okay after years of playing superwoman to take time for yourself. You’ll be amazed at how well everyone manages to get along without your constant attention. Take time to regroup. Make “quiet time” for yourself. Go for a walk. Learn meditation. Reacquaint yourself with your inner child! She’s yearning to be heard. Find that peaceful place within yourself that so many of us seem to sequester away at some point in our lives, perhaps during times of stress, confusion, fear, frustration and pain — just when we need it. In my moments of anxiety and stress, music has soothed me. I have found peaceful moments with the help of Power Surge friend, Christine Magnussen’s Harp recording, “On Wings Of A Dove.
Of course, medication has its place in treating various conditions — many specifically related to perimenopause and menopause. However, medication isn’t always the answer. Not all, but many of the answers may lie within you and, believe it or not, how you “translate” everything that’s happening in your body. Own your body. It’s within your power.
Read and understand. You want to know more about menopause – visit Educate Your Body. If you’re interested in complex medical abstracts the averge woman doesn’t understand, this is not the place for it. We strive to make information you need about this rite of passage — simple and understable. There are menopause primers all over the site. There’s a list of prestigious experts in the area of menopause and women’s health a mile long, all of whom have appeared in Power Surge to answer your questions. Learn from their wisdom. They all talk in plain language. Glance at all the wonderful praise that’s been bestowed upon Power Surge and you’ll know you’re in a safe and caring place.
Become friends with your body. Listen to the messages it gives you. Your body will instinctively tell you more about what’s going on, especially during peri and postmenopause, than test results –and you can learn how to instinctively respond to it. Remember, if you treat your body well during these transitional years, it will treat you well in return… and long down the road. Own your body!
Be sure to check out the transcript library and other areas of the site for more information on menopause symptoms, methods of treatment, recommendations and Ask The Experts areas. There’s also the comprehensive Power Surge Search Engine to find specific information on any subject you’re looking for.
And, by all means, if you want to commiserate with other women — women who truly understand what you’re going through, the Power Surge Message Board and Insta-chat are best places to find them!
Other good “starter” articles are,
I just posted this on the message board in response to “A Dearest Post I Treasure“.
I just listened to http://www.power-surge.com/bio.htm again, and reread the words.
Dearest was such a special person. When I first learned that she had died, I went around the website collecting things like the bio page. I couldn’t save it with the sound for some reason, so I played it and recorded it with my phone so I could listen to her talking whenever I wanted.
That page has some cleanup to do. The header is a bit off. I’ll get to it – sometime.
But go and read the words with your speakers turned up.
You’ll be glad you did!
- Missing You (power-surge.co)
- From Tinks (power-surge.co)
The malware is completely gone from Power Surge, the Google Malware message is gone (if you still see it, clear our your browser cache), the boards are updated and have a fresh new skin.
I think Alice would be proud!
Welcome back, Surgettes!
Power Surge 